Many people make the mistake of creating excuses and it infects their lives for years. The first step to living a life of positive purpose is do not take ownership of an excuse. This is to say, don’t attach yourself to one. No possible excuse is worth limiting your life. For example, I could easily have said that I’m unable to give love because my parents gave me up and put me into foster care, and if they gave me up, I shouldn’t be able to love or trust anyone. But why look at it like that? How would I ever really know what love was without lack of love? Now that is a deep thought.
How could I ever give love if it had not been taken away from me? I know I have something to give that is beneficial because I’ve experienced what life is like when it’s lived without love. I know love is a very valuable thing and is essential to living a happy and meaningful life. It is better to love and give your heart away then just hold your feelings in and never experience true joy. Love is meant to heal, not hurt, but you have to give love in order to receive it. And to give it, you must have the courage to make yourself a little vulnerable.
Excuses become part of our identities, and soon we become afraid to get out of our comfort zones. People tend to strive to live a life within a certain level of comfort and ease. But guess what? Life can and will be overwhelming at times. I don’t know anyone who has lived a long life and said that it was always easy. Life is full of surprises, and not all of them pleasant ones. You must go beyond the boundaries of comfort you have set for yourself.
If you let excuses control your life, expect to never find a true and lasting happiness. Excuses are meant to reign you in and hold you back. They truly rob you of your dreams. They send you on detours and chip away at your self-determination. They take from your spirit and diminish your love of life, until you slowly become boxed in and, eventually, afraid to bust out of the box.
Most of the excuses I hear have to do with fear. Becoming a champion at something starts in the mind. A champion’s mentality starts with an inner belief that he or she can be better than the best, by being faster, smarter and stronger. They are determined. They believe it, speak it, practice it, and live it. In this life, everyone is born with the potential to be a champion. But somewhere along the way, people allow others to break down their dreams. They allow others to destroy their belief in themselves.
Negative people try to replace others God-given gifts, talents and abilities with fear, a sense of defeat, laziness, and feelings of worthlessness. What these negative people don’t understand is that the gifts of the soul can never be taken away. They can be wasted, but the soul is resilient and will bounce back. If you are in tune with your own spirit and soul, you will be able to bounce back, and your inner greatness will always overcome your weakness. Your difficulties were not meant to defeat you. I have learned to never let a weakness destroy my greatness.
I believe that Fear takes you backwards and faith moves you forward. Fear is nothing more than a made-up monster, here to scare you into believing you can’t achieve anything in life. Your faith is the fuel that will focus your energy. The energy will thrust you forward, and soon you will desire to live only in a self-determined way. You will be ready to persevere, knowing that you are never going to give up. You must know inside your soul that you really can achieve your dreams. Live the feeling, this faith, and the feeling will breathe life into your aspirations.
Everyone has a destiny, but you must be ready to work hard to achieve it. The level and intensity of your destiny is determined by the level and intensity of your own desire. Some work hard to build theirs; others destroy their own destiny through laziness. Your destiny will be a direct reflection of your efforts. I don’t believe your destiny will simply come to you. You have to exercise will, you have to go out and get it. You have the tools within you to have a purpose and persevere until you reach it.
It is important to remember that your purpose may also be to save another person’s life emotionally, spiritually or physically. What I mean by this is that you can help another person to see value in their life, but this is best done when you see the value in your own. You can help others believe that they too can give a great gift to this world if only they never give up. Be a positive role model for others, and don’t be afraid to say hello to someone in the hall or on the street. You never know how their life is going, or what troubles are weighing on their minds. Just by your small effort to say hello, you may have just saved their life. Maybe they were on their way to end it all – you truly never know.
The best way to live life is with selflessness, not selfishness. By giving to this world and offering your talents to it, you are literally changing the course of this crazy planet. You are helping to create a more enriching and peaceful Earth.
So Never Give Up. Find the faith within to fuel your spirit. Believe in your vision. Believe in yourself and believe that you have a lot to offer. Use your life to put your stamp on the world. You are unique. Only you can offer that one thing the world needs. Thomas Edison tried over 10,000 times to invent the light bulb. Through perseverance and hard work, he did. You may not be here to invent the light bulb, but trust me when I tell you that you have your own gift to offer this world. I once heard the quote “What a wonderful thought it is that some of the best days of our lives haven’t happened yet.” Believe it!
By Derek Clark, Motivational Speaker and Inspirational Author of Six Books Including Never Limit Your Life and the I Will Never Give Up Book Series.
About Derek Clark:
Derek Clark’s life is one of resilience and redemption. As a child he suffered unthinkable child abuse, abandonment and emotional distress before being turned over to the psychiatric hospital at age five. His thirteen years in the San Francisco bay area foster care system reflected an early life of humiliation, aggression, emotional distress, overwhelming anxiety and being wrongfully labeled.
Psychiatric reports stated that at the age of five years old, Derek had severe behavioral problems. Neurological reports stated that at six years old, he had the IQ of a two year old and diagnosed him with erratic psychosis. Having also been misdiagnosed as mentally handicapped and having numerous emotional and language difficulties, Derek never gave up.
With the help of his foster parents, a great social worker and mentors, he has defied the artificial limitations imposed upon him. This has never held Derek back from accomplishing what he set his heart and mind to. Derek knows first hand how to cope with adversity and overcoming hardship. His past has never held him back from accomplishing what he set his heart and mind to. From owning a very successful corporation to having a family, his maxim is to make no excuses.
Derek is an inspiring speaker/trainer, featured on CNN Headline News, The Ricki Lake Show and The Steve Harvey TV Show. Google has ranked Derek #1 “inspiring motivational speaker” out of 16 million listings and is also ranked #1 for “stories about never giving up” out of 320 million listings. He is the author of six books including “Never Limit Your Life” and the “I Will Never Give Up” book series and has over 100 tracks available on iTunes and Amazon.
As a speaker, author and singer/songwriter, Derek has spoken and performed his music from Australia to Canada including a President of the United States. His true-life trials and personal triumphs have inspired organizations with his message of hope and unwavering perseverance.
His maxim is to make no excuses. He has turned his situation from a victim to a victor, equipping him with the wisdom and the will to never give up.