Motivational speaking for personal and professional development has given me the opportunity to meet many individuals that are stuck or lost in life. I always ask them “how do you talk to yourself? Do you pick yourself part? Did you know that the words you speak have great power to influence your life, whether negative or positive?” There are many times where I am able to help others change their perspective and outlook on life. You are like an unshaped stone or block of clay. Words give shape to our thoughts, and our thoughts shape the person we are. Words also color our perception of the world we live in.
You’ve heard the phrase, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” It’s an admirable defense against insults, but the truth is that words indeed can hurt you. More so even than sticks and stones. You can recover from physical injury, but it can be much harder to recover from the words that fill your mind. You must be conscious of both the words you speak to yourself and the words others speak to you. It takes practice to be aware of what you’re saying. Often words seem to just fly out of our mouths so fast we can’t take hold of their source in our mind. But once you start being conscious of the words you use, it will become habit.
I once heard a great quote: “If you complain, there you will remain.” People’s thoughts can run a deep groove in their minds, until certain ways of thinking become habitual. Our mind runs down the well-worn groove; the path of least resistance. I call it Broken Record Syndrome. The same thing repeats over and over in your head, until you must forcibly move the needle down a new path of thinking. Words of negativity, self-doubt, and criticism seem to form these deep ruts much easier than words of consolation, confidence, and compliments. If you have a voice in your head that emphasizes your own limitations, you will come to think of yourself as limited. If you constantly think of yourself as a victim, you will develop a victim mentality. The victim voice is the voice that says you are not talented enough, that you’re ugly, too short, and nobody likes you. “Poor you,” the voice says, “poor, poor you.”
Words can be like the links to a chain that holds your spirit captive. They can be like a sedative, making your spirit go dormant. But you can control what you think. Be the gatekeeper to your mind, and only allow good things to enter. When you look in the mirror, do you pick yourself apart? Point out all the flaws, zits, and scars? Do you focus on how big your ears and nose are? Maybe you don’t like the color of your eyes or your hair. We all have things about ourselves we’d like to change. But picking yourself apart brings negative energy into your heart and mind. Soon, you start to identify with the negative, with what you don’t like about yourself instead of what you do.
You must ask yourself if you are the type that speaks words of fear or faith. Be a witness to your words by stepping back and observing what comes your way. The more you talk about something, the more it can become your reality. If you look in the mirror every day and pick yourself apart and even say, “I’m fat”, chances are you’ll stay overweight. But if you tell yourself you are a skinny fat-burning machine, you will attract the type of positive energy that inspires you to shed some pounds. You will take actions directly related to the words.
The first step I took toward living a more rewarding life was speaking the right kind of words. I spoke words that inspired great intentions, that brought out the best in me, and that produced encouraging thoughts. Did you know the words you speak and think with can be prophetic? They can completely change the quality of your life, for good or bad. When you speak negative words, words of pity and defeat, you are going to attract these negative forces into your life. When you speak positive words of faith and victory, you are going to attract that kind of power as well.